They're probably more messed up for the fact that Neji nearly killed Hinata and blamed her for years for his dad's death. That's what makes it d!w, in my opinion. I love these two for the politics and their complicated past and how they (in fanon at least) do or do not over come that.

Agreed. It's definitely the emotional element of Hyuuga family politics that really makes Neji and Hinata complicated - it's given them a really fraught history and the fact that marriage between them WOULD be politically advantageous means that they could use what's best for the clan to obscure their feelings for each other.