Booze & YA Lit

[redbrunja]

Last night, I got drunk with a friend of mine and watched New Moon and Eclipse with the rifftrax on. Oh my god so terrible. So very, very terrible. There was much mocking of Bella and the make-up artists and Jasper's ridiculously terrible hair. That said:

a.) part of me really wished I was ten when these came out because if so, I would have been all over Jacob. Seriously, taking off his shirt to tenderly blot Bella's head wound? Bella and Jacob's whole shirtless in the rain convo? SHIRTLESS, RIPPED DUDE IN THE RAIN. I would have been on that shit like white on rice, instead of rolling my eyes that anyone would care about Bella. Find a gf with a personality, Jacob!

b.) watching the movie, I find it unfathomable that anyone could prefer Edward over Jacob. Like seriously?

c.) if someone had been taking shots every time I went 'jesus christ' in disgust, we likely would have had to take them to the hospital.

And rereading this, I think it is a damn good thing I wasn't ten when these books came out.

As a sort of comedy interlude between the movies, my friend and I also watch the Simpson's YA lit episode which was both hilarious and depressing.

On the subject of YA, I just got Divergent and Mastiff from the library, and while I'm looking forward to reading both of them, it is really awkward that both of those books are so big they can't fit in my purse. Awwwwwkward.

Comments

[stainofmylove.livejournal.com]

My sister and I did this one night a few months ago with a lotta liquor and even more sour gummy worms. Watched all three, and by Eclipse it stopped being ridiculous and started making us depressed an angry, lol.

That being said, 100% with you on Jacob vs. Edward. It's not even a contest! What is life?! Hahaha.

[grav-ity.livejournal.com]

I am VERY INTERESTED in your reaction to Mastiff. I have a review in the books 2011 tag, but not many of my friends have got to it yet so...yeah, I'd like to know how you feel when you finish. :)

[fairest1.livejournal.com]

My theory as to why Bella goes for Edward over Jacob is pretty much this: Would you rather date a paranormal creature or BE a paranormal creature? If she goes with Edward, she gets to be a vampire. Goes with Jacob, she's just a girl dating a werewolf. Note that from the very start her relationship with Edward is pretty much:

Bella: Change me into a vampire!
Edward: No. Being a vampire is horrible and angsty and glitter-coated.
Alice: No, that's mostly just you. Being a vampire is pretty cool.

my ultimate point being that I think she'd have been better off with Alice. Get to be a vampire, get to be with someone who isn't a jerkface stalker.

[nereemac.livejournal.com]

This has nothing much to do with anything, but my 12-year old niece has as the banner on her spillit page, a picture of Edward and Jacob kissing, with the tagline: Screw Bella!

I'm not sure how I feel about that, but mostly, I think, YAY.

(It should be noted that until I read this post I didn't actually know what the blokes' names were as I avoid all things Twilight like the plague they are.)

[bitterbird.livejournal.com]

Twilight series are always good for some laughs/"good lords" etc! I agree Jacob is far better than Edward but yeah she does not deserve either of them!

[borg-princess.livejournal.com]

I love rifftrax, they're hilarious and make a lot of terrible movies enjoyable. (except for Fantastic Four. I tried watching the riff of that, and no, nothing will make that better)

My only problem with them was in NM, I think, where they made jokes about Rosalie being raped, which is in really poor taste. Yeah, the movies suck and deserve to be mocked mercilessly, but what happened to her? No.

[whisperingwasp.livejournal.com]

b.) watching the movie, I find it unfathomable that anyone could prefer Edward over Jacob. Like seriously?

I've said it once and I'll say it again, Jacob is the reason I kept on reading this terrible series. I love Robert Pattinson as much as the next lady but even Robert agrees that Edward is kind of lame. XD

I would have been on that shit like white on rice, instead of rolling my eyes that anyone would care about Bella. Find a gf with a personality, Jacob!

I ship Jacob/Bella like burning but yes. The only time Bella seems to have anything close to a personality is when she's around Jacob but she treats him so badly because the silly girl can't get Edward out of her head. Goodness knows why. I mean, how hard is it to make a choice between a creepy stalker who you can do nothing but stare at all day and a hot as hot nice guy who you can actually have fun with?

All I can say is, Thank God for fan fiction.

[cynchick.livejournal.com]

I find it unfathomable that anyone could prefer Edward over Jacob.

Rich. White. Privileged.

I don't like Jacob either, I think he's a chest-thumping jackass who won't take no for an answer. Even so, he is vastly superior to Edward...but he's not the "prince charming" archetype that 13yr old girls are taught to aim for.

I watched the first 3 with my sister for teh lulz, but I don't think I'll be able to stomach it with these last two. Just the fact that they made it a 2-part makes me want to punch someone.

[catteo.livejournal.com]

Oh thank God someone else with the good sense the realize that Jacob is always better then Edward. I mean Edward's pale and skinny and sparkles in the sunlight. WHAT EVEN IS THAT ABOUT?!

[mollivanders.livejournal.com]

The only way to watch those movies is when you're very very drunk ;) I haven't seen them, but I've seen the trailers and even that warrants alcohol.

[shiegra.livejournal.com]

....well, Jacob sexually assaulting her and laughing and mocking her when she hurts herself struggling against him might have something to do with that.

Bella deserves far, far better.