Just.... No.

[redbrunja]

Breasts are lovely things and there are many nice, hot things you can do with boobs in an R-rated fic.

However, when writing smut, you should never, ever, ever have a line like

"He nursed on her breast like a starving infant."

Because I don't care how hot things were before, now they're in a creepy pedophilic place and there's just no regaining that spark.

First, when writing a sex scene, don't go from a 'lover' place to a 'mother-child' place- I don't even care if you're writing incest (which this wasn't).

Secondly, 'nursing a breast' (pauses to let brain implode) wouldn't feel that sexy, imho. Or at least, it sounds the utter opposite of sexy. Nuzzle a breast. Nibble a breast. Hell you can bite, suck, lave, pinch, tease a breast.

Just don't nurse one, unless you're actually an infant and need milk for sustenance.

Also, a grown man should not be doing anything to his bedmate 'like a starving infant.'

Comments

[redbrunja.livejournal.com]

If you're worried about the things I'm reading, maybe you should be helpful and create decent Saiyuki het fanfic!

The author suckered my in! 'Kou/Yaone NC-17 fanfic' the summery said, in words correctly spelled, and I'm like "Yaone having sex, okay!" and then I'm reading and reading and it's.... mediocre but beggars can't be choosers and then OHMYGODPAIN!

(and don't even try to complain about what I read, little miss slash-tastic girl.

(also, your icon is awesome and very a propos.)

[redbrunja.livejournal.com]

I think you should have warned be before YOU dragged me into Saiyuki that the fandom would have no het- I would have though a lot harder before diving in to play with the pretties.

(the fanfiction I read does not contain such evil!)

Oh, like hell! Are you telling me that after your love of badfic + your love of slash you've never run into self-lubing asses or staring soulfully into each other's eyes while in the midst of penetration or.... I don't know, I'm sure there's a line just as disturbing in slash fanfic!

[mzminola.livejournal.com]

Actually, I think 'twas I who pulled you into Saiyuki. Also, I do believe we told you "We love this for the slash. It is so slashy, we bet even you can see the slash."

Though I admit, Yaone/Hakkai was used as minor enticement.

[redbrunja.livejournal.com]

Well, hireadd was the one who supplied the manga which is what really sucked me into the Saiyuki-is-so-awesome-place, but I guess that was you to, so I'll be democratic and blame both of you.

And, since I've now inadvertantly read enough Saiyuki slash to feel confident in saying that it doesn't work (every time I read Goyjo/Hakkai, even when it's written by good authors, I end up hating the characters, and I can't quite get over the married to a woman/likes lots and lots of women' and see them sleeping together.)

And yes, you enticed with the Hakkai/Yaone, teased me, and then there is no fandom follow-though! I'm very, very annoyed about that! Universe! I demand you create more Hakkai/Yaone! Damand I say! I have too many essays and am stressed out! I need polite smut to get me through the days!!!!!!!

[mzminola.livejournal.com]

That's why I'm glad I don't tend to read much fanfic. All my views of characters are based on their canon.

May I suggest cheap/library paperbacks?

[redbrunja.livejournal.com]

Well, I have some books I just bought from amazon.com, so I should have something with some nice sex in it soon (Rachel Caine and vampires, it should be good).

I really enjoy fanfiction, and I've been really spoiled by FMA, Buffy and Harry Potter fandoms. Then I wander into Saiyuki and it's a scary, scary place.

There's something to be said for knowing that what you think of the characters comes directly from what you read, but the best fanfiction will make me look at a character in a new way, so even if I don't change my mind, it's fun.