Go At It Alone

[redbrunja]

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Abso-fucking-lutely.

There are so many things wrong with the pressure to get married and have kids - first, society is mandating one way to live a happy, successful life; secondly, we don't need more people on the planet; thirdly, a kid is a huge investment of time and energy that no everyone wants to make and forcing them to make it is just going to screw up their children.

For years I said I didn't want kids and I am so grateful that no one ever told me 'Oh, you'll change your mind.' Sure, I did, but it wasn't written in stone that I would. And no one should think about what they do or don't want and be told that they'll change their mind or see the light or that they're being selfish for not picking one specific option.

It's not selfish to not create a child that isn't wanted. (Double negative, I know.)

And having a kid just so someone will take care of you when you're old is a terrible reason to have children and a rationalization that comes up a lot.

Comments

[teh-amazing-one.livejournal.com]

I remember when I was being told about the dangers of drugs, someone said, "The reason why people will push drugs on you is to legitimize their own choice."

I think that applies in this situation as well.

While there are a lot of people, there are not so many children/youth. A big problem, at least here, is that we have a growind elderly population and a smaller workforce to replace them. Understandably, fewer women are having kids.

[redbrunja.livejournal.com]

The reason why people will push drugs on you is to legitimize their own choice."

Exactly.

And while I agree that there is a problem with having more elderly than youngster, i think that is a problem who fixes involves restructuring how pay for things like social security, not encouraging people to have more kids.

[teh-amazing-one.livejournal.com]

Too true. I think parenthood should be better supported in this culture/government. There are a lot of people who are holding off of having children because they simply can't afford to. Plus I think there is that societal norm where a woman can work freely and as much as she would like until she has kids with her husband. Then she stays home to care for them.

On a side note, because I have Dollhouse on the brain, this is one of the reasons why I love Adele so much. She's not just the stock character of the Shrew. She's awesome and badass and single. Even if I like her Season One Hair better.

[redbrunja.livejournal.com]

Plus I think there is that societal norm where a woman can work freely and as much as she would like until she has kids with her husband. Then she stays home to care for them.

Not where I am. Where I am, most women HAVE to keep working after their kids are born for economic reasons and a large majority WANT to.

this is one of the reasons why I love Adele so much. She's not just the stock character of the Shrew. She's awesome and badass and single. Even if I like her Season One Hair better.

Total word to all of that! She is very much NOT The Shrew. She's quite clearly the HBIC. And her season one hair was much better.

Also, I wanted to add that Adelle has a very, very interesting and fucked up parent/child dynamic with Topher, which I think is interesting. She recruited him, and he trusts her, and even when she says he's a horrible person there is this 'but I care about you' text/subtext twisted through her speech. It's chilling.